Claim Statement Essay (Essay Sample)

Claim Statement Essay
Name:
Institution
Claim Statement Essay
Divorce rate have been on an inclining trend in US and many other countries pending the question ‘why?’ Statistics indicate that the average lifespan of most US marriages is 11 years with most of the divorces resolved without court cases, other than for legal certification. There are numerous arguments that are ascribed to divorces including irreconcilable differences, infidelity, abuse, desertion, incompatibility and irrecoverable breakdown. Since the past, divorces are viewed in a bad limelight especially due to religious beliefs. Most religions believed that marriage vows should never be broken and that couples are meant to stay together for life in ‘in thick and thin’. The institution of marriage in most religions is regarded with utmost and solemn importance (Hughes, 2010). Divorces are not lightly regarded so they are not flimsily used as a means to arbitrarily choose a new life. Conservationist of religion believe that laws for divorces should be made stricter to deter prospectors and to boost couples attitude towards initiating mechanism to make the marriage last. My thesis statement is that one should not be reproached for leaving ones wife and family in the strive for a happier life.
Fault-based divorce laws have existed to dissuade couples from disassociating their marriage. Couples were compelled to seek the other's cooperation if he or she wanted to file for divorce. In such court cases, one of the couple who is considered to have committed infidelity, desertion or any cruelty is considered guilty and the innocent party is given the right to either deny or hold a divorce in bargaining for a favorable alimony or property settlement. The fault – based system was deliberately made arduous to deter couples from arbitrarily file for divorces but rather give incentive for resolution of disputed in the marriage. This system allowed for persons who committed to the institution of marriage to recognize its importance (Hughes, 2010).
However, it had its short-falls when it came to couples who are in consent for a divorce. They were compelled to concoct a false story of infidelity or cruelty since one had to be found blameworthy in a court case. The system was significantly successful in showing it intolerance to vices that threatened family and ultimately social order. Nevertheless, with advance in time and with increase in frequent divorce cases, the attitude towards divorce is steadily and significantly changing.
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Different theories have been employed in the attempt to understand the cause of divorce in the society. While divorce in the past was depicted as a result of a selfish act of self-interest by one couple in contravening the marriage vows by infidelity or mistreatment, contemporarily, it is understood that occasionally marriages fail for the lack or steady dissipation of intimacy between the couple (Parker-Pope, 2009). While regarding sex as the basis of a relationship was depicted as erroneous and misconstrued. However as the science and technology advances, scientists and psychologists are able to explicate and corroborate the role sex plays in invoking intimacy that is key in marriages. Studies have shown that divorce cases emanate from an estrangement in physical intimacy which is followed by emotional intimacy that leads to distant relationship and ultimately divorce. When coupled are affectionately involved with frequent sex they become emotionally intimate and frequently hold hands, kiss, cuddle as regularly maintain skin-contact. These couples are less probable to divorce compared to couples who are not sexually and emotionally intimate (Thornton, 2007).
People and couples in today’s view are becoming more liberally viewed on the issue of divorce just as may they equally feel a reduced necessity to indulge in marriage. Even religious stance in marriage is steadily shifting from their previous conservative view on marriage to more liberal stances. If coupes are unhappy together and have attempted every means to resolve and have miscarriage, then the church allows for divorce. State laws have also changed over time and no fault divorce systems have supplanted the former fault-based system. Contrary to the former laws, no-fault laws do not demand that both couples have consented to divorce. Consequently the rates of divorce rates have skyrocketed. Current statistics have indicated that four in every five divorce cases is unilateral (Gallagher, 2002).
This essay tends to endorse that divorce especially attributed to the dissipation and lack of intimacy is justifiable. ‘Intimacy”, a book by Kureishi Hanif to corroborate the proposition that unhappiness in marriage counters the essence of life which is to search for felicity. Kureishi, a controversial writer, endeavors to countenance and justify his approval for persons who leave their unhappy marriage and engage with their mistresses. In his book, Intimacy, that is polemically perceived to be a depiction of his own life experiences, begins by capturing the audience sensual emotions as he delves into prose that is sexually imbued. Kureishi, who started out as a pornographic writer, is exquisite in ferrying his audience in sultry with his mistresses as he contrasts the feeling to that which he experiences with his wife back at home. In a prose whose timeline is mere 24 hours, Kureishi depicts the world as an already foul place and that people find solace in pleasurable things.
He then continues that mere goodness does not suffice and that finding passion to counter the feeling the world gives should be recognized as typical human attitude. The book is imbued with emotional outpouring and angst of a man who is unbearably and incessantly fretful of his condition with his family. He delves into a loneliness and vanity he feels at his home. He continues that he experience claustrophobia and estrangement. A quote in the book; “There are some f***s for which a person would have their partner and children drown in a freezing sea” (Kureishi, 1999) is Kureishi favorite line that he apparently uses more than once to explicate his feelings. He describes his wife as plain and dexterous who is categorically focused on daily chores and matters and has little sensual attentiveness. He continues that Susan, the name of the wife, is tough on committing on daily family chores and necessities, she seemingly copes well with issues and that she could do well without him. Jay, the mane of the character, also indicates that Susan is an embodiment of other busy mothers who have little time for intimacy.
From the solemn mood in his house which he fantasizes on leaving in the middle of the night, in a sumptuous manner shifts to his mistress who he describes as freelance, carefree, desultory and caring in a protagonist’s lax to compare to his wife. The fight to contemplate leaving his family begins in his mind where he relishes being free from domestic grind and rigors. "Susan often reproaches me of lack of practical application. It was what my teachers alleged, that I didn't focus in class. But I was focused. I conceive the mind is always centered on something that indulges it in enthusiasm. Skirts and jokes and cricket and pop, in my instance (Brown, 2008).
Despite ourselves, we know what we despise, like and our errors and distracted excursions are illuminations. Possibly only the undesired is worthwhile...” (Kureishi, 1999). This line indicates the conscious battle that the character is undergoing in his point in life when he is excogitating on his next move as he endeavors to find justifications and reasons for why he thinks he should abandon his family for a ‘better’ life. He underscores, in a cynical attitude, his futility in trying to reignite the spark in an already irreparable social bond. The thought of leaving his two sons offers a major dilemma in his decision but which he resolves that they would be fine since their mother is perfect raising them. Jay indulgence goes to the extent of comparing his divergent lives to two high school friends of his named Victor and Alex. Alex, who is ostensibly comfortable with the unhappiness in his domestic life, tries to convince Jay to adapt to his and persevere.
Jay depicts that Alex as proud to be loyal to one woman. On the other hand, his other friend Victor had left his wife earlier and was ostensibly enjoying the merits of bachelorhood and jay was categorical on Victor’s promiscuous ways. The thought of Victor’s life which he deeply envies, provokes the thought of Nina his mistress. Kureishi is extremely cynical about marriage and describes it as an entrapment that deprives one of his personal dreams and aspirations as one has to cater into those of his mate. Nonetheless, he also acknowledges that the love and intimacy he attempts to find in Nina could also fade and end up like marriage. "Suppose it is like an illness that you give to everyone you meet," (Kureishi, 1999) Kureishi is apparently distrustful about relationships and thinks that loneliness could follow him. Jay ponders into his parent’s marriage who he describes as imbued with frustrations for one of his parents seemingly felt satisfied with what they were trying to find in marriage. They were, according to Jay, unfaithful and disloyal to themselves.
Expressed in poignancy, there is a staunch feeling that Jay is desperate for a feeling of love and acceptance though it is expressed ostensibly in an irresponsible protagonist manner. This is apparent in the line where Jay while returning home promising himself to stick to the marriage if that night his wife touched him in a sexual way which discouragingly does not happen. The book which is a short prose of 150 pages is filled with explicit content of Intimacy that...