The Role Played by King Lugalzagesi of the Mesopotamian "World" Empire (Essay Sample)

Assignment brief
You have already done the preliminary work of choosing your historical figure, refining your research question and looking for relevant scholarly sources. This assignment covers all the preliminary stages involved in writing an essay, without actually writing the essay itself. You should take into account any feedback that you were given for assignments #1 and #2. (You can, of course, modify your treatment of the research question as your ideas develop or if you find additional relevant information, but if you wish to depart radically from the research question you’ve presented in your previous assignments, then please consult with your Instructor or TA).
Your outline should include the following:

(1) a title that encapsulates the research question you are addressing. This should give a clear idea of what your study is about.
(2) an introductory paragraph that sets out your chosen topic and how you plan to address it. Are there any particular aspects of the topic that you plan to focus on, and if so, why? Don’t forget to include your thesis statement in this paragraph.
(3) the body of your essay outline. Here is the place to list the main points that you will include in the essay. In each case you should indicate how the point relates to your overall topic, and which sources are relevant. Some sections in your outline may be devoted to explaining and analysing the evidence. The overall order is down to your judgement, but the outline should be structured so that it guides the reader through your presentation of the evidence and your arguments to your conclusions.
You can format this section using headings and sub-headings, or bullet points, if you wish, but please present your ideas and arguments using full sentences (rather than in note format). Bibliographic references should be given as in-text citations (author/year/page format, as for Assignment #2), not in footnotes (further details on citation style are given below).
(4) a concluding paragraph.
(5) a bibliography, including at least 5 sources that you have consulted. A combination of books (apart from the course textbooks or similar general works), book chapters and/or academic journal articles is preferred – you may cite from approved online translations of primary sources, but your secondary sources should be print publications. Do not use web sites as secondary sources.
In general you should avoid using older sources (though there may be perfectly valid exceptions to this) – the sources you choose should reflect our current state of knowledge, not that of several decades ago! You will lose marks if you do not use good, reliable sources; if in doubt about a particular source, check with your instructor or TA.
Criteria for Assessment
The assignment will be assessed on how well you have:
selected an appropriate research question;
explained your chosen research question and how you plan to address it;
formulated your thesis statement;
presented the evidence and developed your argument;
formulated your conclusions;
identified relevant, good quality sources in your bibliography;
presented your work in a scholarly manner, including correct formatting of references and bibliography.
IMPORTANT REQUEST: when I submitted assignment #2, the prof made the following comment;
While the essay has benefitted from an interesting and important research topic, there were a number of factors which were problematic. The most pressing would seem to be the issue of source - most of the sources used were either derived from non-specialists or were quite dated. It would be advisable to consult with a TA or the professor if you are unable to locate suitable and informative discussions of this king's reign. Without this kind of data source it is of course impossible to properly frame a research problem and to produce a compelling and reflective thesis argument. You might consider engaging with primary sources bearing on Lugalzagesi's reign, see: Frayne, Douglas. 2008. Presargonic period, 2700-2350 BC: early periods. Toronto: University of Toronto Press. In addition see: Schrakamp, Ingo. 2012. “Lugalzagesi.” The Encyclopedia of Ancient History. Hoboken, NJ, USA: John Wiley & Sons, Inc Finally, a chapter written by Piotr Steinkeller addresses the specific issue of the development of proto-empire in this period: Steinkeller, Piotr. 1993. "Early Political Development in Mesopotamia and the Origins of the Sargonic Empire." In Akkad the First World Empire: Structure, Ideology and Traditions, edited by Mario Liverani, 107-131. Padova: Sargon SRL