Why Many British Families of South Asian Background Prefer Arranged Marriages? (Term Paper Sample)

WHY MANY BRITISH FAMILIES OF SOUTH ASIAN BACKGROUND PREFER ARRANGED MARRIAGES?
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INTRODUCTION
Over the years, South Asians have been known for their tradition of arranged marriages. It is yet to be determined if it the practice is religious or traditional. In spite of most girls and boys in Britain with South Asian origins being educated, most of them still prefer arranged marriages. Majority of them enjoy going to Britain to further their education, but when it comes to looking for spouse they go back to get who their parents choice. Some say they prefer this to keep their customs. Others are because it promotes their image or even fear of gossip, but all these depend with an individual.
CUSTOMS
In most Asian communities, it is customary for parents to make marriage arrangements for their children from a tender age. This was a form of creating greater bonds within the families. According to the book ‘Honor and shame to counter generation gap, the writer talks how the girls just get married for the customary reasons. He goes ahead to explain how the girls will go out there and get the education and for the sake of their culture they come home to marry. For those who cannot afford to take their education further take the opportunity to work in the family business or their in laws businesses so as to gain the skills. Some do it to maintain their traditions also be able to pass them down to next generations. Although in most communities the traditions are fading away, most families in Pakistan have managed to keep it. According to R. Stanley in  HYPERLINK "/articles/332/1/Arranged-Marriage-Love-Marriage-and-Cross-Cultural-Marriage/Page1.html" /articles/332/1/Arranged-Marriage-Love-Marriage-and-Cross-Cultural-Marriage/Page1.html he believes in spite some of the girls just do it because they do not have a say rather than maintaining their customs. Kinship ties are also a reason why they consider keeping their culture. Some believe that the linage they marry from will determine how their families will be. This link is highly considered because of the clusters they have for the clans. It is a taboo if a girl gets married with a boy from a lower cluster. To avoid the courses that come with this, the girls prefer maintaining the culture and taking the choice they have been given. According to the book ,‘honor and shame to counter generation gap’ the author emphasizes on this point by saying makes to be even easier for the girls. Most tend to agree in spite the traditions it is easier to work with someone they know hence develop the kinship ties.
Culture clash and religion
To avoid culture clash, some girls believe if they go for what their parents have chosen is okay, for it will be easier to avoid these clashes. Some believe that with the wisdom, the parents have they will know the right person for them hence avoid any culture or religion clash. Even if, most children born with parents with different cultures find it to be hard to find an identity, that will mainly depend with the parents. According to Stanley in  HYPERLINK "/articles/332/1/Arranged-Marriage-Love-Marriage-and-Cross-Cultural-Marriage/Page1.html" /articles/332/1/Arranged-Marriage-Love-Marriage-and-Cross-Cultural-Marriage/Page1.html he says the parents especially the mother will determine which culture the children will adopt.
Education
Dahya, B. (1972), ‘Pakistanis in England’ in New Community, Vol. 2, pp. 25-33 he clearly talks about how many girls are going to Britain to get further education. In spite of these girls migrating and getting their education, majority still prefer arranged marriages. The education gives them leeway to be better mothers. In spite the education some would consider arranged marriages, so as to maintain their links back home. Getting another educated spouse from home gives them some sense of comfort. When a girl is educated, she is considered of exceptionally high value to the community. Therefore, some parents find it to be crucial to arrange for them their spouse, so as to get more dowries. This becomes more applicable because most of the girls in Britain who are from South Asian background, either come from a poor family or rural background. This also works to their advantage because if one is married of through an arranged marriage it removes the fear of gossip. Most ladies in the western world who are educated are believed that they cannot respect their husbands. Therefore, when one goes through education, it is best if they get married through arranged marriages.
Image
By the time, most ladies in the west get married majority they are not virgins. In the South Asian cultures, Shaw, A. 1998. ‘ A Pakistani Community in Britian’ Oxford, Basil Backwell the woman should be protected, and her virginity is key to this. If one gets married through an arranged marriage, the lady has a better image. This is because on the wedding day the man has to prove that the lady is a virgin; therefore, the lady takes exceptional care of her image. The arranged marriages also help the families or the couple to avoid promiscuity. If one at the back of their mind, they are aware they have a spouse it will be easier for them to avoid promiscuity and gossip among their peers. If a boy is considered to be the ideal candidate for their daughters, the image of the boy is crucial. Although the spouse are chosen when the partners are still very young, the girl should be married by the time she is 18 years to avoid bringing shame to the family. The arranged marriages are also considered, to avoid bringing shame to the family. In these communities, a girl does not have a say with the marriage she wants. Therefore, for her to keep the image of the family is paramount to obey what has been arranged.
Unity
The arranged marriages are normally arranged when the child is as young as four years old. This is done to maintain friendship between the two families. From a tender age, the two families maintain close relation even though the spouses are never meant to meet until when they are ready to marry. This is one of the reason families in Britain prefer having the arranged marriages. If any of the spouses refuses to get married to their selected partner he or, she is considered to be an evil omen to the two families. This is because their friendship will change hence even making the two families enemies.
Divorce
In the western world, the divorce rate is high. This makes the British families with the South Asian origin to prefer arranged marriages in relation to what author Ballard, R. 1972. ‘Family Organization amongst the Sikhs in Britain’ in New Community 2 (1) 12-33. Before one gets married through an arranged marriage, they are taken through some training on how to handle their spouse; this is believed to be the cause why there are fewer divorces among the South Asians. Most westerns are believed not to have respect for their spouse hence the high rate of divorce. If you are coming from South Asia submitting is crucial but in the western world, it is taken as a way the woman been mistreated. Divorce is also low with the arranged marriages because the couples are ensured they are compatible before they get married. Unlike falling in love marriages, in arranged marriage the partners should come from ...