Love And Intimacy: The Major Concept Under The Topic (Essay Sample)

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Love and Intimacy
The Difference between Love and Intimacy
Love and intimacy are two things that walk together. Love can be described as an emotional, intellectual, sexual or a social affection that people hold with each other. Some possible concepts of love include desire, care for, serve or adore. On the other hand, intimacy refers to having close relationship under which there is a mutual acceptance, trust and nurturance sharing at some point (Gordon 19). Understanding love in the relationships of human being requires first understanding the way self inhibits or enhances the ability of someone to love.
Attachments
Attachments are usually important in the life of a human being. They are emotional contexts emanating from relationships people have in life. When at an infant stage, human beings learn to trust those that cared for them. They learn that it is possible to depend upon such people. Along the way, the brain developed such that it allows one to love such people and care for them regardless of whether they are reciprocating or not. The same attachment while as an infant happens when one is an adult (Gordon 19). This implies that, if someone was subjected to a strong attachment while young it is easy forming strong adult relationship. If the attachment was weak and interrupted, forming a strong love relationship is difficult as an adult.
Falling in Love
One can understand when falling in love if one feels better when close to the person. At the same time, one can exist in love so long he or she desires. The reason is that love develops with intimacy which needs one to be true self when in a relationship with the person one is being associated. The following figure shows what can be referred to as vulnerability zone;
Figure 1: The Vulnerability Zone
Source :( Gordon 1)
The two photos displays how relationship of two people by-pass the stages of getting to understand each other well and finally enters a vulnerability zone. The boy and the girl here begins engaging themselves together and avoid the possibilities of getting hurt so as to enjoy some safety, avoid personal conversations and other risks. Either of them can attend classes, social events or other works but vow to stay in safe zones (Gordon 16). However, it takes a short time for one to realize what she or he is avoiding to risk yet they have good social skills that can be utilized to avoid such situations. In such a circumstance, however, an entry of intimacy and love automatically removes them out of the safe zone thereby revealing their natural self to each other. People enters an emotional field any time they share something vulnerable with each other as shown by the blue arrow (Gordon 16). At this point, someone is at risk because their past relationships, failures and fear of becoming exposed makes them not to let the other person understand their true nature.
Self- Disclosure
Risk factor takes position between two people immediately when self-disclosure occurs. Once self-disclosure have been adequately reciprocated mutually intimacy will begin. However, if reciprocation fails, it is difficult for intimacy to develop. Human beings are created to have love experience. Attraction is chemically connected. They emerge when individual oxytocin, testosterone, estrogens and dopamine, among other body biological components get attracted to each other according to biologists and psychologists (Gordon 17). Sociologists ascertain that it is through individual needs that make people come to each other while according to theologians, they explain love as divine and significant part of the eternal natures of humanity.
Reality of Love
Irrespective of the type of love, loving some is risky because there are always hurt feelings and possibility of pain. Others suffer from the injuries of love they have experienced in the past which continue to haunt them even after entering a permanent relationship. Sometimes this results from unrequited love which i...