How Divorce Effects the Children (Essay Sample)

Name
Course
Lecturer
Date
How Divorce Affects Children
Divorce is one of the decisions undertaken parents when they no longer see the need of being partners in the institution of marriage. Divorce breaks the family unit by letting the mother and the father be on their own, following the unresolved conflicts between them. In this case, the division is adopted as a way of solving the differences between the two parties by allowing them to seek an alternative partner or marriage. Although divorce has been concluded to have adverse effects on children, other research findings indicate that such effects are temporal, and that majority of children can overcome them in 2, to 3 years (Jeynes 305).This paper examines the effects of divorce on children through the analysis of drugs and substance use, stress and anxiety, adolescent delinquent behavior, school performance, success in life, and early sexual engagement. The author will also pay attention to the health of children by looking at obesity and health care cover of the children of divorce, and finally, the life after the adjustment period.
Children whose parents have divorced are likely to engage in drug and substance abuse, compared to their counterparts who have their parents. According to Jeynes (305), the children whose parents have recently separated, have a higher chance of becoming heavy users of drugs and other substances, than those whose parents separated in four years or more. The divorce reduces the contact of the contact between the children and the father who leaves the household; this also causes strain to the parent with the children. The drastic change of parental control in the lives of children accompanied by the psychological changes has the potential of indulging them in drugs and substances use. However, according to Jeynes (306), children are exposed to the possibilities of abusing drugs, during the initial conflicts and separation period. Divorce only worsens the situation when they learn that their parents will longer care for them as a couple. Drugs, especially alcohol, are used by such children to counter the stress that has just developed in their lives by making them more vulnerable and lonely (310). The ability to use certain drugs is determined by peer pressure and the behavior of either of the parents towards drugs.
According to Portnoy (127), children of the divorced parents suffer from anxiety, depression, and lower self-esteem. His study demonstrates that girls are more affected than boys, and such effects are likely to continue in their adult lives. The financial breakdown that emanate from the majority of divorces will lead to lifestyle degradation, especially if the mother is a homemaker. The mother is forced to move her children to affordable living conditions that are poor, hence affecting the emotional stability of the developing children.
Divorce, however, can prevent the occurrence of stress and anxiety that was developing in children, if the father is violent (Portnoy 127). Since divorce is a product of misunderstanding, quarrels and expression of behaviors that affect the existence of peace in the household can be stopped by the two parents divorcing (Ahrons n.p, cited in Morales 1). In this case, divorce can lead to the increased income of the mother who can ensure that children under her custody are living a better life without their father (Gray and Chapman 28).
The adolescent delinquent behavior is the characteristic among the children whose parents have divorced that those whose families are intact (Portnoy 128). The children of the divided couple have behavioral problems, antisocial behaviors and problems with the authorities. According to Jeynes (310), some of the habits portrayed by children are derived from what they see; their father abusing the mother. In Portnoy’s perspective, the boy-child is highly affected than the girl-child (128). The academic performance of the divorced children tends to drop following several adjustments that occur after the divorce. However, some children become competent-opportunists, following the divorce of their parents (Portnoy 129). They show few behavioral problems and engage with people who are beneficial to their lives. Such children will drop their friends, whom they feel to be less useful to them and pick on those whom they see be aiming at being successful in education and career. In this perspective, the competent-opportunists attain a high level of success in their professions, following the experience of divorce in their families.
The conflicts and separation of the parents lower the academic aspirations of the children, hence affecting the class performance, leading to lower educational achievements. In this case, divorce predicts the future of the children whose parents have separated permanently. According to the Coughlan (n.p) of BBC News, 65 percent of GCSE students whose parents had divorced recorded a drop in performance that was attributed to the separation of their parents. 44 percent felt that their A-level results had suffered the consequence of divorce; while 15 percent reported an immediate effect, following the divorce. However, according to Portnoy (129), some children whose parents divorced emerge successful in their academics, professions, and social contexts. The children are likely to set goals high following their family breakdown. The children develop a post-adjustment pattern of being competent-at-a-cost; feeling that they have to achieve more in life hence making them more successful than those who have both parents.
According to the research findings of Portnoy (128), girls have the potential of engaging in sexual activities at a younger age and have multiple sexual partners if their parents were divorced. Boys also could start practicing sex earlier than those who have both parents. The first engagement in sexual activities results from the broken communication between children and their parents. In most cases, the hardship and challenges of life disengage them from their family at an earlier age, exposing them to risk behavior without their knowledge. The early sexual experience typically occurs in the short-run, when the mother and the children are adjusting either to new environments or new tasks to be accomplished in the household.
The divorced family is vulnerable to the incompetence or diminishing parenting (Jeynes 307). The mother has to endure the responsibilities of two parents that in most cases become hectic to fulfill as required. She is forced to transform into a harsher and less warm mother; hence withdrawing from the children. The majority of the adolescent perceive their fathers as less caring and more than 30 percent, questions whether their fathers had the love for them (Jeynes 307). The children, whose parents have divorced, have higher chances of having failed marriages in their future lives. According to Portnoy (128), the divorced children have the ability to develop conditions and fears of commitments in their relationships. They are likely to see divorce as the best way out of the marriage when they see the possibilities of their relationships resembling that of their parents.
According to Reinberg’s study (1), children whose parents have divorced, have a high chance of becoming obese. The obesity in the children, according to him, was contributed by maladaptive behaviors that the mother chose to balance the household chores of cooking. For instance, the mother could resort to unhealthy foods since they are easier to prepare and serve than the nutritious foods. Children become subjected to the processed foods that increase their weight making them obese. The diet is cheaper than the food they have to prepare at home. The boys were at lower risks of becoming obese than girls since they will be stressed in trying to assume the position of the father in the house (2).
Divorce can affect the health-care insurance of the children, in case the parents separate and father, who may be the sole breadwinner fails to comply with the child support requirements. According to Warner and Steinmetz (14), a marriage that is dissolved in less than ten years of its existence, subjects the other beneficiaries of health care insurance at risk. The children covered under their father are at risk of losing their cover on Medicare. Although The Consolidated Omnibus Budget Reconciliation Act (COBRA) provides a continuation of cover when there is change in circumstances, or "a qualifying event," such benefits may be limited to the div...