Interpersonal Communication (Research Paper Sample)

Interpersonal Communication Student’s name Course name and number Instructor’s name Date submitted
Interpersonal Communication
A Letter to Rosemary and Frank
Dear Rosemary and Frank:
Interpersonal communication involves the exchange of information, meaning, and feelings between individuals through verbal and non-verbal messages. Therefore, you need to know how to talk face to face to each other either verbally or non-verbally without hurting the partner. You both need to know that interpersonal communication is not only about what is said, but also is associated with the language used and how it is said. In fact, interpersonal communication is central to romantic or marriage relationships; it involves gestures, facial expressions, body language, and tone of voice among others. The way two people interact when they first meet can either ignite or extinguish hopes of future romance. Couples’ communication is connected with what partners think about each others and how they feel about their relationship. Patterns of interaction can even determine whether a relationship continues or ends. In short, communication not only reflects romantic relationships, it also defines them. The paper will dwell upon interpersonal communication and its impact on couples or romantic relationships (Kelley & Thibaut, 1978).
Research and theory on similarity and physical attraction clearly illustrate the centrality of interpersonal communication to the initiation of romantic relationships. When people initiate relationships, they have to communicate to gather information about potential partners, to give information about themselves to partners, or to present themselves as attractive and likable. Obviously, these and other interpersonal behaviors do not cease once romantic relationships are established. The specific behaviors enacted by individual partners may change over time; and certainly, the way in which people think about and respond to certain behaviors will change. As the relationships develop, partners will also begin engaging in patterns of interaction that they did not enact when they first met.
Studies on interpersonal processes that take place in the context of romantic relationships have focused both on the behavior of individual partners as well as on the patterns of behavior enacted by romantic dyads. Individuals’ communication patterns are influenced by the cognitive and affective characteristics that individuals bring to their initial interactions. Furthermore, because romantic relationships are dynamic and reflexive, the cognitive and affective characteristics that emerge from partners’ interactions influence their relationship (Kelley & Thibaut, 1978).
The number of factors that can influence whether two people come together and form a long-term romantic relationship is daunting. Some researchers say that individuals’ selection of one mate over another happens largely by chance (Karney & Bradbury, 2000). On the other hand, attraction and relationship initiation are considered as the result of biochemical reactions in the body systems. In addition, it is also suggested that mate selection involves a series of strategies employed by individuals who are attempting to maximize their reproductive value (Kiecolt-Glaser et al., 1997).
Fortunately, the broad range of explanations offered for how and why people come together to form romantic relationships has not prevented researchers and theorists from systematically studying the phenomenon. Scholars have examined processes that affect the development of romantic relationships studying the variables that encourage people to initiate the relationships. For instance, it is suggested that the initiation of romantic relationships is constrained by both physical and social contexts. People are more likely to start romantic relationships with individuals who are physically proximate than with those at a distance. Although the advertisement of social networking sites, Internet chat rooms, and online dating sites allows for the initiation of more long-distance relationships, people who start their relationships online usually progress to meeting face-to-face if they are interested in long-term romantic relationships (Karney & Bradbury, 2000).
Generally, many relationships are initiated through face-to-face interactions; therefore, the pool of potential partners available to people is typically limited by individuals’ social network. People tend to interact with others who are similar to themselves in terms of variables such as age, socioeconomic status, and education. As a consequence, the group from which individuals are likely to select a romantic partner is relatively homogeneous (Kiecolt-Glaser et al., 1997).
While the environmental constraints on relational initiation are stronger than many would like to admit, it is important to note that individuals still make selections within a relatively homogeneous pool of potential partners. Any number of variables ranging from their perceptions of the other person’s social competence to how lonely they feel when they first meet a potential partner may influence the choices people make concerning relationship initiation (Kiecolt-Glaser et al., 1997).
Principles of Interpersonal Communication and Misconceptions
Interpersonal Communication in Marriage is Inescapable
Dear Rosemary and Frank, the following are the principles of interpersonal communication that you should always consider when talking to each other. The principles form the basis of communication between the two of you. The first one presupposes that interpersonal communication between the two of you should be inescapable; both of you will have to communicate. You live in the same house, you do the home chores together, and you sleep on the same bed; therefore, there is no running away from communication. The communication will involve not only words, but also gestures, tone of voice, facial expressions, and posture. It is normal that we always talk to people around us, thus getting information from others. The basic principle of communication is that to create attachment instead of criticism centered judgment about behavioral intent (Kelley & Thibaut, 1978).
Interpersonal Communication in Marriage is Irreversible
This principle says that both of you, Rosemary and Frank, cannot take back something that has already been said. The impact of what each of you says will always remain. Once a word comes out of the mouth, it cannot be taken back. This means that you both need to be very careful with what you say because no one can take back spoken words. For instance, if Frank says that his wife is lazy and unreliable, this will hurt her psychological and mental health and will be embedded in her mind for a long time. On the other hand, if Rosemary mentions that Frank is not a man enough, this will hit him hard and hurt him for the rest of the marriage if a divorce does not come on the way (Karney & Bradbury, 2000).
Interpersonal Communication in Marriage is Complicated
All forms of communication are hard; due to the numerous numbers of variables, even simple tasks are highly complex. Theories explain that whenever we talk, there are six individuals involved. They include what you think you are, what opinion you hold about the next individual, what you believe the other person makes out about you and vice versa. This principle explains that we swap symbols and not ideas. The situation complicates the channels of communication because the meaning of words and symbols is not inherently established in all cultures (Karney & Bradbury, 2000).
Interpersonal Communication Involves Ethical Choices
Ethics is the division of philosophy which focuses on moral values and codes of conduct. Ethical concerns differentiate between what is either accepted or disapproved by a community of people. Whatever you say and do affects other people’s perception creating a feedback for the communication. Therefore, responsible people think carefully about ethical guidelines for communication. For instance, should you not tell someone something that might make him less willing to do what you want? Do you judge another person’s communication from your own individual perspective and experience? Alternatively, do you try to understand the communication on your counterpart’s terms and from his/her perspective? Negative feedback is a concern in any situation because it picks on the feelings instead of addressing the immediate problem to find a solution (Kantor & Lehr, 1975).
Richard Johannesen (2001) devoted his career to ethical aspects of communication.
According to Johannesen, ethical concern is when one attends to others mindfully, and when their communication demonstrates that they are authentic and empathetic of each other. Because interpersonal communication affects others, ethical considerations are always a part of any interactions. Throughout his book, we note ethical issues that arise when we interact with others. Therefore, as you read, consider what kinds of choices you make and what moral principles guide your choices (Johannesen, 2001).
Interpersonal Communication Effectiveness Can Be Learned
We mistake when we think that people who communicate effectively were born with this talent. It is true that some people have a natural talent to excellent communication, but still people can learn to acquire those characteristics. Through various forms, people can learn to be effective communicators, just as they learn to play guitar and footfall among other activities (Kiecolt-Glaser et al., 1997).
Misconceptions
Frank and Rosemary, you both need to know that the context of interpersonal communication is controlled by your feelings about it. People tend to stereotype other individuals; as a result, this leads ...